


Meant to Be (Bucky's Version)

by Golden_Werecat



Series: Soulmate Verse [2]
Category: Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes-centric, Internal Monologue, M/M, POV Bucky Barnes, Pre-Captain America: The First Avenger, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Protective Bucky Barnes, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Time Skips
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-11
Updated: 2019-11-11
Packaged: 2021-01-27 14:02:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21393370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Golden_Werecat/pseuds/Golden_Werecat
Summary: Bucky had been so excited for Steve. He remembered the joy he had experienced when he received his own mark. He couldn’t wait to see that same happiness reflected in Steve’s big blue eyes. Instead he found his friend alone and crushed, cruel, taunting words scrawled across his skin.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers
Series: Soulmate Verse [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1542316
Comments: 4
Kudos: 118





	Meant to Be (Bucky's Version)

**Author's Note:**

> Higher rating for Bucky's gutter mind.  
I tried my best with the accent.
> 
> This story is written in two parts. The first one was Steve's POV and this second one is Bucky's. If you haven't read the first, you should give it a try. 
> 
> Finally I made Bucky a year older so each part matches up with each part in Steve's.

** Age 13 **

So many people were obsessed with the thought of finding their soulmate, their other half. They spent hours obsessing over their words and what they would mean for their futures. Bucky though? He found himself obsessing over someone else’s instead. He had been so excited when he originally got his. It was a sign of growing up and a way to find the person meant for him. He just knew whoever it was would get along great with Steve and Steve’s soulmate. Then a little over a year later his best friend in the whole world got his mark.

Bucky had been so excited for Steve. He remembered the joy he had experienced when he received his own mark. He couldn’t wait to see that same happiness reflected in Steve’s big blue eyes. Instead he found his friend alone and crushed, cruel, taunting words scrawled across his skin. At that moment, everything else took a backseat and Bucky swore that he would make the asshole pay for upsetting someone who meant so much to him.

** Age 14 **

As the years went by, Bucky saw his friend retreat further and further into himself. He tried to distract him by “preparing” for his own soulmate. He flirted with everyone. Every now and then his flirting attempts would garner a laugh and Bucky would feel like he was king of the world, but it would never last for long. When they were together he would do anything possible to make his friend smile.

When they were apart, though, then he would plan. When Steve mentioned that his soulmate’s writing seemed familiar he started sending those around the two of them dirty looks, keeping others away. Any of those people could mean the true end of his friend’s happiness. Steve never noticed.

For a while he had hated Steve’s mom. She thought it was _funny_ that someone could be so cruel to someone as _sweet_ and _caring_ as Steve!? But he didn’t let anyone know, she was the only other one capable of making Steve smile. He couldn’t let Steve realize anything was wrong.

He had to keep Steve safe and happy and he would never be either with someone who would say such things at their first meeting. So Steve’s soulmate had to disappear. He planned for as many eventualities as he could. Every little detail was accounted for and in his planning his own soulmate was forgotten, replaced by someone far more important.

** Age 15 **

After Bucky turned 15 his mother announced that she had finally saved up enough for an extended visit to their family in Virginia. They would be gone for an entire month. What if Steve met his soulmate during that time! He would have no one to protect him from the asshole! He tried to convey the importance of this to his mother, but she just smiled and informed him that he was going. No exceptions. In his panic he promised to write to Steve. He hoped that he would be able to be there, at least in spirit, should the worst happen. It was a long grueling month and Bucky spent most of his time worried about Steve, but Steve only seemed to get more excited as the month wore on.

Bucky wasn’t expecting Steve to show up seconds after they got back, hoping yes, expecting no. He wasn’t going to complain though. He opened the door do his bouncing best friend who immediately exploded into sound. At first all he could catch was something about a soulmate and his stomach plummeted, then he caught the rest. _He_ was the monster who had caused Steve so much pain. _He _was. He wasn’t even mentally there anymore as he closed the door and returned to his room in horror. How would Steve ever be able to forgive him? How would he be able to even look at him again?

It wasn’t until the next day that his mother had finally had enough of his sulking and demanded to know why he shut the door in poor Steve’s face so he told her. He told her how he was a jerk and a monster and didn’t deserve someone as sweet as Steve. And his mother with all her patience looked him dead in the eye and responded “I love you, but you’re an idiot. You were two and Steve was a tiny, wrinkly, preemie one year old. I love Sarah and Steve with all my heart, but he looked like a bad peach. A really bad peach. The kind you throw away no matter how hungry you are.” And with that she got up and left Bucky to come to terms with how much of an idiot he really was.

He almost returned to things as normal when he got to school, but then he remembered his mother’s words about closing the door in Steve’s face and that combined with how Steve seemed to be avoiding him just made him feel like trash all over again. He didn’t want to cause Steve anymore pain so he followed Steve’s wishes and stayed away.

Over the next two weeks he would see Steve and his bruises and he had to fight to keep from running to his side. Steve _needed _him, but he didn’t want him anymore. He no longer had a place there, but the withdrawal was nearly killing him. His mother seemed to get more and more frustrated at the lack of Steve in her house and the abundance of Bucky in its place. She had started to send him dirtier and dirtier looks as time wore on.

Finally, for the first time in two weeks, he caught Steve looking back at him and the look nearly sent him to his knees. His big blue eyes were nearly begging Bucky to come back to him. The next day he approached Steve as soon as he was able to only to realize that he had no idea what to say. So he talked about the weather and asked about Steve’s mother, anything to avoid what he most needed to talk about. And then Steve interrupted him.

“Can’t we at least still be friends!?” Whatever Bucky was expecting it hadn’t been that.

“W-what? What are you talking about punk?” Where was the yelling and the screaming and the calling him an asshole?

“I miss you Buck. Even if we can’t be together can’t we at least still be friends?” Steve was giving him one of his sad smiles. He hated those smiles. They only came out when Steve was expecting that his request would be rejected. Bucky felt his heart sink.

“You don’t want to be together?” He had waited too long. Steve didn’t want him anymore. He had finally realized how much better he could do with his heart of gold and he was leaving Bucky behind.

“I do!” Bucky’s head jerked up. “More than anything. I thought you didn’t want to. You shut the door in my face.” Bucky felt his heart lift even as he flinched. Steve was still willing to give him a chance! He nearly started jumping in joy, but he forced himself to stay calm.

“Stevie” Bucky replied, voice soft. “I’ve spent the last three years planning how I was gonna dismember and hide the body of the asshole who was stupid enough to say those awful things to you.” And Steve would never find out just how detailed those plans had gotten, or the people he had already payed off to look the other way and vouch for him. “My first thought was that _I was that asshole_ and then I thought you were avoidin’ me. I didn’t notice the looks until yesterday.” And that one look was all it had taken to know he was a goner. With crisis averted Bucky felt his emotions take a drastic turn and his hormones kick into gear to fill the emotional vacancy.

“No Buck. You would have said these words when we were still little. L-like mine.” As Steve blushed Bucky’s mind took an immediate trip to the gutter. Oh yeah he wanted to play alright. _All night long_. In his daze he missed most of the rest of Steve’s sentence, something about giving and space? Fake it.

“Yeah I figured that out punk. The big doe eyes were a bit of a clue.” Mmm those eyes. If only Steve’s lips had also been wrapped around his…

“So?” Right, they were in public and having a conversation and Bucky’s thought were in no way appropriate for either. But Steve was leaning closer and his eyes were still big and blue. Ah screw it.

“C’mere punk.” Steve tasted like heaven and sin rolled into one. Bucky was sure he’d never get enough.


End file.
